Lydia

It is not easy to feel comfortable in one’s skin or to be happy with one’s body when you see all those slim, confident and beautiful women in magazines, in movies and on television.

I’ve finally realized that I’m beautiful because I do my very best to be a good person.

Recently, I’ve changed my life radically because I want to be healthy, slim and fit for life. I’ve changed my eating habits and I’ve fitted in daily exercise.
It is a lifestyle change for the rest of my life but, losing weight is what matters most right now.
I’ve given myself a year to reach my target weight and a trim figure.

Tabby helped me see that I’ve embraced who I am but I’m still struggling with my self-image. I’m working on it.

I’m not happy with my body but I’m really really happpy that I’ve decided to eat right (and indulge sensibly on occasion) and exercise regularly.
I thank the lovely Tabby for helping me find the strength within myself to do that.

I saw The Sisterhood of Traveling Pants and I loved it. I haven’t found ‘Real Women Have Curves’ in the stores here (Belgium) yet.

Raelene

Just thought I’d say that choosing The Sisterhood of Traveling pants was a great one to start with! It really connects people, especially girls, which I believe is part of what you’re doing….You’re helping to make us (teen girls) feel better about ourselves and to kind of learn more about ourselves, which is portrayed greatly in the movie. I would just like to put in also that A League of Their Own is probably my all-time favorite movie…but I guess you’ll get that when the lead actress plays the same position as you do….so I’m looking foward to what you have to say about that movie Kristin…

Denise

YES!!!!!A LEAUGE OF THEIR OWN!!!! I am so happy you picked that

Real woman have curves was an intense movie, the mom was well a B*tch, im glad americas character went out and did the right thing for herself.

Robby

That’s a really good review Kristin. It’s definitely like the normal reviews and you speak right to us, an aspect that gets lost in the technical aspect of making sure the reader knows al the actors and plot and so on, but sometimes that’s not important, especially not if the main plot is the most interesting.

I’ll be looking forwardto Movie Mondays.

Krystal

Nice choice with “A League of Their Own” ladies!

Maxima

Dear Kristin,Tabby and Kendra, and all the girls on GBD;
I did like the movie. Now, I have to tell you that I did not like Ferrera when I saw her on Ugly Betty, but she is very good I thought playing this part.
The thing about image and the way media treats it does really bother me. “MONEY, POWER and PHONINESS”.
On the whole look thing, I personally think that a girl’s
attractiveness and femininity has nothing to do with the perfection of her shapes and features, but has everything to do with the expressions of these features and shapes.
Most importantly, if you are beautiful on the inside, that will project on the outside “Big Time”!
Anyway….what I really like about the movie is how emotional the story was, the kind of film rendition that puts the Hollywood monster to shame.
Ciao ragazze!

skahahoo

omg that’s a long comment! sorry about that. lol.

Binks

Well, to my utter disbelief the internet nor blockbuster would supply me with this movie.(and shockingly, I don’t have HBO) So I had to suffice with watching a few clips and trailers from it. >_> (not a happy camper about that)

From what I could tell the movie had a strong message which is very clear and consistent throughout. Be happy and proud of who you are, beauty isn’t determined by your physical nature but by your spirit. I did not like the mothers [looks around] *whispers* b!tchass-ness… towards her kid losing weight, but it hasn’t been the first time I’ve seen something like it, and it probably won’t be the last. The flan part was funny, “Don’t eat the flan…” *MUNCH MUNCH* nice….probably something I would do, haha. Actually, most teens would. We rock. xD We just gotta do what feels right to us, sometimes it ends up being good, sometimes it ends up biting you in the butt, but in the end it’s your body, your decisions and your life.

It -(looked)- like a good movie to start with on GBD. And fit pretty well with what Tabby has been blogging about.

Can’t wait for the next movie monday haha something tells me Kendra might be writing our next review.

Ver0nik21

A league of their own!! awesome!!!

I love this movie! it’s pretty cool at first I wasn’t too excited since it’s not my kind of movie but just like i was wrong with sisterhood of the traveling pants! I love it!
I guess everybody kinda has this experience about our parents (not in such a controlling way :S)
Well and yes these days weight seems to be a big deal, hopefully after watching this movie everyone can get the message and love themself because of who they are! no what they look like!!

xoxoxoxo

Have a great day

Gina

DUDE. I have to see that movie. For real. I’ve heard a lot about it and it’s been on TV recently I think!!

…Luckily, my parents didn’t push me to do anything, although they did give me a choice: Get a full-time job or go to college. Fair enough. Probably one of the biggest things I’ve ever had to do was to move 2,800 miles away from my family and friends. I’m from Connecticut (yeah, that tiny state rofl), but I went to an AI in Los Angeles, CA. And BOY was I confronted with some major issues about myself, my weight (as I mentioned much earlier) and later learned that my body thought I was starving it. Long story lol.

Sorry, but I have a sudden urge to sing “You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt because it’s true! You ARE beautiful.. Which brings me to my next point: Would be even be worrying what our hair looks like, how much we weigh, or if there is a gigantic zit on our nose if we loved ourselves that much? Thing is, we’ll never be satisfied with ourselves. There is always SOMETHING, perhaps one little thing that is off. And that one thing can make you feel really insecure about yourself.

Also… If you’re going to have an emo/pouty attitude about life, that isn’t going to do you good. In turn, how far will you get with that? Maybe on a reality TV show, who knows these day. Hah.

@skahahoo:
Word up. I agree with absolutely everything you said. My parents would be the same way. No matter what happens. *hugs*

Ver0nik21

@ skahahoo

Don’t worry it’s always nice to share these things and kinda therapeutic!

wish all the best

xoxoxo

Delaney

I think that is a great movie pick. I watched the first one and I want to see the 2nd sister hood of the traveling pants. It’s rough at times to think your beautiful. I admit I have been down in the mopey-mopey. I am in pretty good shape I do believe I am beautiful and can accomplish anything in the world. I am trying to get really fit and toned, I just hate getting to the gym and really hitting it hard. I am pretty motivated, but in my work out I am at 95% and feel like I just want to quit( I am working on that ) but I digress. I am only 13 but I am working my way to be a journalist/author and musician. I am already making my own album out of “Garage Band” on my Mac Laptop. I think all women are beautiful. It’s not all about how you look, its how you carry yourself, your inner heart; it’s about what is in your soul. Confidence is beauty too. I love being a young lady, and everything that comes with being a bright and kind soul. I love how I am able to do and be what I want to be when I am older. Periods/Menstruation is kind of annoying and mopey but that’s a part of what makes girls “Girls”.
I love being a GBD girl/member and I love being a girl.
I love being me!
Thank you so much Kristin and all the other GBD.
xoxo,
Delaney

skahahoo

This is in response to the question the GBD post brought up about defiance and weight. I’m paraphrasing (please correct me if I’m getting it wrong), but I think the question is: If you truly loved yourself, would you act defiantly, even if by doing so you end up harming yourself in the long run? (If you haven’t read Tabby’s “Defy, Defy, Defy” post, what’re you waiting for?? No seriously…you should read it. It’s very insightful. )

On the surface, it would seem that if you loved yourself, then you wouldn’t harm yourself. But I don’t think it’s that simple. For one thing, people put themselves in harm’s way out of love for others, but that doesn’t mean they don’t love themselves. But that’s a separate issue. With respect to defiance specifically, I feel that without self-love, defiance is impossible. If you didn’t believe in your own self-worth, that simply being you was valuable in its own right, then what legs do you have to stand on when you rise up to resist or challenge something?

That doesn’t mean defiance is always good for you. I’m just saying that it is possible, in fact necessary, for someone to love herself in order to be defiant. When the defiance ends up being harmful, I interpret that as being a misguided expression of self-love. Whether or not that person realizes she’s misguided…well, that depends on her life experiences. With my patients, that often comes down to having a near-death experience to shake them up and realize, “Hey, maybe eating fried chicken everyday isn’t the best way to go.” lol. The hope, of course, is that it doesn’t come down to that, and instead people will have more of the quiet type of realization that Tabby had.

But you know what? I’ve had so many patients who, even though they know they’re leading an unhealthy lifestyle, don’t change. But I don’t think it’s because they don’t love themselves (although to be honest…that has been an issue for some of my patients). Mostly, I think they’re just regular people trying to get by, doing the best that they can. And a lot of times, with all the different types of stress they have to deal with, their own health falls to the bottom of the ladder when it comes to priorities. What can I say? People are complicated. But life would be boring if we weren’t.

@Gina & Ver0nik21 – thanks for the hugs and smiles. i’m not sure what got into me last night. i think it was because i was on call. being on call will do that to you. lol.

@Delaney – that’s so awesome that you make your own music! AND you wanna be journalist/author? wow. when i was 13, i think the hardest thing i ever did was wonder what to eat for lunch. lol.

Kristin

A league of their own is an amazing movie!!!!

Gina

HELL YES. That movie is DA BOMB. I remember seeing it so many times when I was a kid. rofl!!

natalie j.

that movie is really good i would like to recommend the movie No Reservations its a chick-flick so some people may not like it……but i do!!!

Emma

@Skakahoo
I agree.. life can be messy and unpredictable, but isn’t it a question of whether or not your self-esteem can cope with ups and downs along the way..
Also I think your self esteem has nothing to do with the way you look. Isn’t self esteem about accepting that you ARE a flawed human being; but that its OK to be flawed?!
You get perfect looking people who are miserable on the inside and that makes them unattractive, cos they’re too busy worrying about the ‘perfection’ in their looks, that they don’t give off attractive vibes to other people.

Ver0nik21

Nothing much just felt like writing haha

Have a wonderful day!!

xoxoxoxoxo

Daisy

That was a great review. I’ll def. have to pick up that movie soon.

skahahoo

@Emma – I totally agree with you about how a person’s attractiveness is very much affected by her personality and outlook on life. Absolutely. You bring up this really great question though about self-esteem’s relationship to looks, and whether or not self-esteem is about recognizing your flaws and being ok with that. I think this is a really, really interesting question because it comes up a lot in my work. First, let me say that I do think it’s silly to judge people on things that are more or less beyond their control…the bulk (but not all) of physical appearance being one of those things since that mostly boils down to a genetic roll of the dice. BUT, when it comes to the issue of weight, I find that things get very, very tricky. While I realize that some people do retain fat more easily, or are born with naturally stockier frames, I also know that from a health perspective, it is generally not good to be overweight. And I know this is an extremely sensitive topic, especially for women, ESPECIALLY young women. So there have been times when I’ve seen people who, according to all the tests and measurements, are overweight and suffering from health problems that, in my mind, are related to their weight, but their perspective is one of, “Well, I’ve always been big. This is how I am. And I’m ok with that.” Now obviously, I’m not going to beat them over the head about it because I don’t want them to leave the hospital crying. lol. But do you see what I mean? I’m always struggling with this issue because I feel it’s my responsibility to help people get better.

Micke

i am just wondering if you girls whant 2 hear, something from a guy?What guy,s think abaout this?//love

superkurre

I didn’t watch the movie recommended, cause I honestly couldn’t find it. Finding anything in the DVD rental places in Finland is a chore, since sometimes the film titles have such goofy translations. As an example, it took me forever to find Imagine Me & You cause the title in Finnish had nothing to do with the original. Good movie, BTW, highly recommend it.

I guess I had no point to this except to say that I think A League of Their Own is a wonderful movie, I think I’ve seen it about 10 times. Used to have it on good ol’ VHS, but now can’t find it on DVD. Darn… Would be nice to see it again.

Not that this is relevant either, but just thought I’d mention to anyone interested that La Môme, the Edith Piaf movie that came out last year is TERRIFIC!!!! I’ve never seen such acting. Good film. That is all.

Emma

@Micke
Of course we want to hear from a guy’s perspective! Just the fact that you’ve joined, and therefore support a great initiative like GBD already says a lot about you! So please give us your take as well these things as well!

@ Skakahoo
You sound like you have the most amazing job, working with people!
You know it’s interesting what you said about some people, just accepting that they’ve always been overweight or unhealthy and almost finding a level of ‘comfort’ in their misery, I agree though that’s it’s important not to judge people, but sometimes you want to just shake them out of their ‘It’s my cross to bear’ head space and say, ’stop allowing yourself to live like this’..

I’m beginning to sound like a Psych 101 person here.. lol, but I’m fascinated by what you do…thumbs up to you for that kind of work, not everyone can do that!

xx

skahahoo

@Emma – Thanks for the encouragement. I need it because as you mentioned…I want to shake people, like, EVERYDAY. lol. Not always my patients. Mostly the insurance people. lol. I’m working on that though…trying to resist the people-shaking urge.

Ashley

I was just flipping through channels a moment ago and stopped on the Oxygen channel and “A League Of Their Own” is on

Chin Salcedo

Thanks Kristin for saying that we are beautiful. Coming from you it’s truly heart warming. I think people need to hear that more often. With a noone like me struggling to find the confidence I need, what you wrote has touched me (..and here comes the dreaded tears..ugh! hihi).
Again, thank you Kristin. Thank you so much.

Renaud

First of all, sorry for my english language, I’m French. Moreover, i want to apology being a man in his 20’s !
Seriously, I have been struck and quite sad when I read that you girls were worried about what people could think about you, about how people picture you. But it’s all the more interesting that I understand (I hope) what you feel.
Thus, we all have to notice that medias, TV, movies, advertisement and magazines (especially women’s one) daily harass us and make us think NOT what the perfect woman has to be, BUT what ALL women have to be. If it is to believed, you all should look like a deadly skinny 6 feet tall 17 years old girl !!!
I think it’s deeply noxious and this kind of diktat sounds like eugenics.
We don’t have to forget that all of this aim to make money, big money : medics-books-methods to lose weight, plastic surgery, cosmetics, expensive fashionable clothes…

Regarding books telling how to lose weight, you might have heard about a french woman’s book (living in the USA): “French women don’t get fat: the secret of eating for pleasure”, it’s the worst lie ever !
I’m not saying all french women are fat, but it’s one more evidence that it’s just a question of money….and an other way to make women feel guilty.

All these theories take us away from what beauty really is.
Beauty is in difference, beauty is in mankind.

I got skinny girlfriends and I got plump ones. France is full of different people from different countries and I could say I’ve seen beauty in every women I met.
Don’t worry, I’m not the only one who thinks that.
I know that most of women (if not all) often wonder that themselves what men think about them…
You would be surprised…
The way you smile, you laugh, you think…that’s the most important, the most revealing, the most appealing.
I’m not saying stop brushing your teeth and waxing your legs (lol) but just be the woman YOU want to be.

On the whole, nobody has to/can tell you how to live your life.
Let your dreams become true.
FREE YOUR MIND

A French young man.

Mallu from Brazil

Hi Kristin, I guess that i am a little late to coment your text, but liked so much of what you wrote that have to do this…. What you said about parents was really incredible… I mean, family in Brazil is something to much important…. Even the relationship between parents and kids has changed a lot, here, in my country, the opinion of them has massive influence in our lives… We are always trying to please them… and they are always concerned in dont left that we suffer… Me, for example… I will do college in Medicine… I dont know if this is really what I want for my life, but I know that is what my family want for my life and so decided to do what they want… I know that if I changed my mind about my carrer, they will support me, but I know too that they will be very disappointed… Then as I dont know for sure what I want for my life, I still doing what they think that is good to me…. Because I know that they want the best to me, but i know too how hard is to see that expression of them saying: “I warned you that this would happen”….
thanks for this website… You, Kendra and girls of GBD has helped me a lot….
Kisses from Brazil