This is Binks. She’s livin’ la vida loca in Mexico right now.

Once again, I want to go to sleep, but Mari insists that I post the Fun Facts.  Mari hates me.

Anyway, last week’s true fact was…#2!

1. Kendra makes up adventure stories with Marcus.  In these stories, Marcus is Leonardo, dad is Raphael, Kernie is Michelangelo, and Kendra is Donatello.  <–  FALSE.  Kendra does make up adventure stories, but with a different cast of characters: Marcus is Mr. Waaazoo, Kernie is the Faithful Friend, and Kendra is the Mermaid Princess.  Yes, that’s right, the Mermaid Princess.  And even though these characters aren’t exactly the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the dad comes close, since he is the Sea Turtle King.  Also?  Don’t tell Kendra I told you, but she works as a professional ninja to make ends meet.
2. When Kendra was a baby, she had to have surgery to widen her eyes.  <–  TRUE.  And, as you can tell from the photo below, the results are so natural looking YOU CAN’T EVEN TELL.

   

3. While Kendra was pregnant, she was really, really gassy.  So gassy that she passed gas about 150 times during a Smallville meeting.  She says no one noticed because the farts weren’t smelly.  I think no one noticed because they all passed out from the vapors.  <–  FALSE.  Kendra says this wasn’t her, but a friend.  Uh huh.  Kendra, why don’t you keep telling that story while I go open a window.
4. In her free time, Kendra likes to give Binks and me mild strokes by having us shorten the blog’s category list, only to suggest adding more categories AFTER WE FINISHED RECATEGORIZING THE BLOG.  That cackle you hear is Kendra laughing in the background as she plots our demise.  Someone pass me my heart pills.  <–  FALSE.  They weren’t strokes.  They were heart attacks.  The rest of this is true though.  And you thought Kendra was all bubbly and nice.  Please.

Also, if you remember from last time, Mari loves to eat her pizza with ketchup and/or mustard and mayonnaise.  I thought that was wrong…deeply, deeply wrong.  But apparently, this is how they do in Brazil.  Joaninha_s said:

I’m totally in with Mari on the pizza thing.. no one here gets it but ppl in Brazil DO eat pizza with ketchup, mustard and mayo….I really think that at least the ketchup should be mandatory to come with the pizza in restaurants and stuff… but i get it.. its the same for us in Brazil when we watch american movies and see ppl actually eating bacon in the morning! it’s just gross…for us. but here is completely normal and now i get it… differences, differences.. arent they beautiful?

Joaninha, Joaninha, Joaninha…differences may be nice and all, but it’s BACON that’s beautiful.  Beautiful beautiful bacon.

Anyway, here are this week’s facts:

1. Binks created swine flu and it backfired.  That’s why she’s “on vacation.”
2. Binks crashed the car once when she was backing out of her garage.  Her mom was not impressed.
3. Binks got into a knife fight with a goat when she was growing up in Tijuana.
4. After I constantly nagged her to include more vegetables in her diet, Binks finally gave in by adding extra ketchup to her In-N-Out burgers.  *sigh*  Well, at least it’s not on pizza.  ;)

Binks’ life goal is to figure out how to inject these intravenously.
(photo: Simon Willison)

Binks, if you’re reading this, this wasn’t my idea.  It was Mari’s and G’s.  So don’t take it out on me.  My broken jaw is still healing from the last time you got mad.

Thanks to G and Mari for the facts!  And to G again for the photo!